Tips for Common Mom-to-Be Frustrations
Posted by Michelle Kersey on Fri, Jun 11, 2010
Deciding on registry items
With so many choices in every area of the baby store, it is very frustrating to decide what to register for. When we created our registry, we were so overwhelmed. I have now learned what is necessary and what is not. Read the Baby Shopping Checklist I prepared. What I found most helpful was talking to my friends that have young children. I also stopped being shy when talking to strangers. If I saw something that looked neat or if I saw a mom pushing her stroller with ease, I had to stop and ask what brand it was and how she liked it. Most moms are more than willing to share their experience with new moms.
Installing the Car Seat
I remember the first time my husband and I installed the infant car seat. We felt like complete idiots. We must have read the instruction manual 5 times in a row and with a confused look on both our faces attempted to properly install the seat. After lots of sweat, we decided to get help. I found a website called seatcheck.org where you can get information on installing car seats as well as finding a place to get inspected. Most hospitals will have a car seat check, as well as some police stations and fire departments. When we took our car (and car seat) to the inspection, we gained so much knowledge and were able to feel confident installing the car seat on our own after we left. Not only did they show us how to install the seat, but also how to position the belts and clips around the baby and how tight they should be. If the car seat is one of your frustrations, take it to a professional. I felt a million times better about the safety of my son once I knew how it all worked.
Breastfeeding
While breastfeeding is natural, it is not easy! I knew that I wanted to breastfeed, but no amount of reading or research prepared me for the actual experience. I asked for help my second day in the hospital, but the lactation consultant couldn't make it to my room before I was discharged. We managed for the first couple days, but my second day home my son had spit up with blood in it. I freaked out, we went to the ER and after they couldn't tell us what was wrong I followed up with the pediatrician. Without getting into grave detail, let's just say that I needed to use Lanolin. The next few weeks weren't any easier. Breastfeeding is very frustrating and lots of learning went on for the first few months. Many calls were made to friends who successfully breastfed and much more time was spent researching and "practicing". Experience was by far the best asset, and by the time my son was 3 months old, we finally had the hang of breastfeeding and it was smooth sailing for the next 9 months.
Figuring out Fact from Fiction
The hardest, and most frustrating, part of a new parent is deciding what is fact and fiction. So, when a family member told me to make a crib bumper really thick so the baby would be protected from hitting her head, I consulted with my pediatrician. When it comes to myths or changes in generational beliefs, your best resource is your pediatrician. There is no one more educated on keeping your baby safe than your pediatrician. Even if you don't agree with your pediatrician 100% of the time, they will tell you straight up what you should do. Then, the hard part, as a parent you have to decide for yourself what you believe.
Adjusting to Changes
With all the changes of a new baby, it is easy to get overwhelmed quickly. So, what is a new mom to do? Well, this mom asked for help! This is very difficult for most new moms; they want to do everything on their own. However, not asking for or accepting help will wear you down so take it when you can. If you have a friend come over to see the baby, ask if she'll stay with him for a few minutes so you can get a refreshing shower. Sometimes you also need to let go of control. This was very difficult for me, my family wanted to help, but I am a slight control freak. The dishwasher must be filled the way that I do it. Well, I had to let some of the control go so I could get help and take care of myself and the baby. Adjusting to all the changes is very frustrating, take a deep breath, ask for and accept help.